Sunday, February 11, 2007

When??

Silence is beautiful word, emotion, act, ruthless behaviour, powerful tool, self-belief, confidence, and 'happiness'. But does everyone gets it? How many desire for it? How many experience it? How many pursuit for it, fight for it, live for it? Well I don't know what am I doing. Where am I going. But I know what I want. I want freedom, I want to make my own rules, I want satisfaction, joy and that 'happiness'; I don't care whether that comes with fanfare or in the crowded streets or individually; but I desire it.

For the past few days I am getting restless, confused, angry, frustrated, irritated, feeling like chained. I want to shout, yell but can't do it. I want to speak but not even that. All I can do is to hear but why? I want to be myself, is that a crime, vicious desire or an immoral action.

Am I only a day-dreamer? Do I have enough courage to start? Am I strong? Or am I clear of what I want and where I want to reach? Am I a wanderer standing at a cross or in a highway or surfing the wave or riding the national speed? I don't know about any of them but I am sure that I have to go for it.

I think I've never waited to return so eagerly but its too far. I will do my work, I will be patient. But today I was very happy.